I am slowly but surly working my way to getting Baptized, and it is crazy how excited I am. It has been scary getting as far as I am now because I admit it is hard to trust someone you cannot see but I have prayed and I now have faith. I refuse to get Baptized until my life is right because I am doing this for all the right reasons. I got the biggest thing out of the way and that was getting married. I could not be happier to be the wife of Michael Tuck but our issues were financial. We did it, and are changing those last little things in our life and I got to tell you we really are not scared anymore. At first all I could think about was money money money, but I really know that God will take care of us. I know he has helped me so much. One of the biggest ways I can see he is helping me personalty is that I am a person that hold grudges. I can forgive a person but it is so very hard for me to forget but I really have prayed and I can feel how he has helped me with that issue. There is so many other ways I know he has helped me and I am so ready to give my life to my savior. I am so excited to have my family serving the Lord together.
Things I continue to pray about is to let go of things and people. I guess change is hard for me and it is often hard for to let go of people in my life that have always been in my life but I know that everything will work out and who knows maybe if people see how much I have changed my life they too will one day want to do the same thing.
Another thing is the way I worry.. I am always worrying about tomorrow when the bible plainly tells you to just worry about today for we do not know what tomorrow brings and if he took care of the lilies of the Field then he will take care of me if I put him first. It is crazy how much of my time I waste worrying about Christmas for my kids or birthday presents. I pray that I can stop worrying so much and enjoy life a little bit more.
One last thing I hope to change is how shy and nervous I can get around people. I am not shy at all once people know me but when I around new people for some reason I get so shy and nervous and I don't want that. I want to make lots of true friends that love God. It is just hard to do when I become a turtle in a shell. I pray for that as well. I want to meet people and not be nervous.
There is many more things I hope to change but those are a couple of the main things. I know everything will take time and I am so ready to take this new adventure in life. It will be such a great feeling and already is a great feeling to be sitting in church with my kids. I am trying to be a good role model for my kids and I know this is the best way. Thank you Jesus for all you have done for me....
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