Monday, January 24, 2011

Giving up on worrying........

Lately I must say I have been feeling a sense of relief with my life. I know it all came from the man upstairs, prayer is amazing and I do know that but I am human and did get weak. I still have most of my same problems but with the help of prayer, my wonderful church family, great friends, and more...I learned to not worry  and for the most part I think I finally learned how to just give it all to God!! That was so hard, when I would hear people say that. I just did not understand how to give money problems to God, well I now see that if I could not truly give it to him then I did not have faith in my wonderful Lord!! I now believe he will take care of me and it is crazy but I feel myself getting better. People trust me when I say this, worrying can make you sick!! I was not sleeping, turning to food and just a wreck!! All I did was worry about how we was going to pay this, how we gonna make sure the kids get a good Christmas, how we gonna eat, where is Michael gonna work, and so on and so on..... It was making me depressed and just taking over my life!! What a eye opener it was for me to learn the definition of the word "worry"- It means to torture oneself with thought. It means to actually torment yourself!! What?? Why torment yourself when God is telling you and begging you to just give everything to him!! I pray that I keep this positive attitude I have and just keep asking God to help me because I can really tell a difference!! It feels almost like a weight has been lifted off of me. I now just feel guilty for not having strong faith in God before. Michael got laid off of his job and I just kinda gave up there for a second. I know the past is the past and I know God forgives me, I just hope I learn from that mistake and stay strong the next time "the devil" comes prowling. I know he will always be on me but I was reminded that " God knows ALL temptation".  We have a wonderful God and I am so glad to know him and thankful for that cross!!!

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