Finially first shift!!!

After almost 3 years of working second shift, my husband finally gets first shift!!! Yay!! 
Working second shift is a hard shift to work but add the fact that you always work a couple of hours overtime and it is worse. 
 Michael worked two days second shift this week and on Tuesday night they told him to come back Wednesday morning and start first shift. That was a little hard but that was OK because we was so excited to have first shift!! 
 The even better news to this, is that it is just in time for football season. Football season is like candy to our little family and the last couple of years sucked because I had to go to some high school football games with just me and the kids. I am so excited to know that my husband can now go with me!! Yay
 I am very thankful to God for this because first shift is also gonna be so much better for Michael's health and his spiritual life. If you are a diabetic it is very important that you live you life on a schedule and eat at the same time everyday. When Michael works second shift he usually only eats twice a day and that is not good. The past couple of days that he has worked first he has ate three times a day. Fingers crossed, this will make all of his sugar problems go away.
 Last but not least is Michael's spiritual life... When Michael became the most spiritual in his life was when he was on first shift. It was a great time for us. He really enjoyed going to church every time the doors were open  and I am just praying that this is what God has planned for our life again.

My pity party

 I don't really know what is going on with me. I am so depressed lately and I can't seem to overcome it. My back pain is severe and the arthritis I have is just unbearable. I feel like I am always hiding my pain and I don't know why. I just pray that we get medical insurance soon. I know how bad I need medicine. The worst is that I have not been to school in 5 weeks :( The last week I went I took Josh and Katie with me to do there hair and I was crying in pain. I can't believe I jumped into this without thinking of my pain. I was just so happy when I got a call asking me did I want to come and do something I always wanted to do. I can't believe I am 32 and in so much pain

New Year's Resolutions!!!

This year has came and gone so fast, it is just hard to believe. I got my resolutions ready so here we go...
1. Get my depression taken care of. I know I have a problem and I love my family to much to just let it get me. Don't knock someone with depression unless you have suffered from it. It truly gets you and is so hard to control
2. LOSE WEIGHT... I don't even know how I got this fat so fast but I am  and I got to lose it
3. Be a better wife
4. Be a better parent
5. Get closer to God 
6. Be more productive
7. Watch my anger
8. Keep a cleaner house
9. Pray more
10. Try to stop pleasing others so much

There you have it, my 10 New Years Resolutions for 2012

100 facts about me!!!

It is my 100th post... so here is 100 facts about me!!!!
1.My whole name is Amanda Gail Hardin Tuck
2. I have 3 wonderful kids, Josh,Katie,and Ada
3.I have a wonderful husband Michael Tuck
4. I am going to palmetto beauty college
5.I seriously want to lose weight
6. I miss having friends that I use to have
7. I am a sinner saved by Christ's grace!!
8. I have been married three times
9. My birthday is 5-3-79
10. Josh's birthday is 4-20-01
11. Katie's birthday is 3-29-03
12. Ada's birthday is 10-10-08
13. My wedding anniversary is May 20th
14. My favorite color is blue
15. My favorite food is Lobster
16. My favorite drink is Sprite
17. My favorite actor is Nicholas Cage
18. I love love Clemson football!!
19. I love football period
20. My best friend is Christie Bradburn
21. My have the best dad in the world
22. I have 3 half sisters and one half brother
23. I was raised half Jehovah witness and half Baptist
24. I do believe in love at first sight
25. Michael Tuck is my soul mate!
26. My kids are my life
27. I love going to church
28. I have learned a lot of hard lessons in life
29. I am way too trust worthy
30. I have major social anxiety
31. I hate people that pretend to like me but don't
32.I love to blog
33. I love tv
34. I am scared of mice
35.I love cats
36. I love to shop
37. I wish I had stronger faith
38. I cry easily
39. I don't have good eyes
40. I had to have a major back surgery in 06
41. I wish I had more friends
42. I do have a problem with depression and that sucks
43. I forgive easy
44. I love chocolate
45. I love Young and the Restless
46. I love country music the best
47. I love all music
48. I love buying things for other people
49. 2 years ago my daughter, Katie had a really bad 4 wheeler wreck
50. I love to sit in hot tubs
51. I love to swim
52. I love going on long drives
53. I hate seeing other people hurt
54. I hope to hit the lottery one day
55. A lot of things still bother me from my past
56. I have migraines
57. I have a lot of pain from my back surgery
58. I like to take long walks by myself
59. I hate hypocrites 
60. I wish I had a closer family
61. I waited tables for a long time
62. I have been arrested several times in my past
63. In my past, I did a lot of partying 
64. I hope to travel one day
65. My kids always make me smile
66. Never been on a plane
67. When depressed or upset I turn to food
68. I love to look at paintings
69. I like history
70. I like doing hair
71. favorite holiday is Halloween
72. I wish my kids could stay babies forever
73. If I had more money, I would want another baby
74. I dream a lot
75. It is sometimes hard for me to let things go
76. I wish I had smaller feet
77. I wish smoking pot was not illegal. Truth be told :/
78. I wish Michael would stop smoking
79. Mine and Michael's Hotel we always go to is the Holiday Inn in Duncan :) LOL That is our place
80. Michael was the first man to buy me a real diamond
81. I wish I was a better house cleaner
82. I wish Michael would take better care of his diabetes
83. I love to take long hot baths
84. I think I will always struggle with this stupid face acne
85. I breast fed all three of my kids for 3 months
86. I am crazy when I get really mad
89. I am glad I gave another religion a try besides Jehovah Witnesses. 
90. I don't judge other people for there choice of relgion
91. I am glad to be an American
92. I hate cancer
93. I worry way to much
94. I argue with my mom  a lot but I do love her
95. My car is ALWAYS dirty
96. I wish I had bigger boobs
97. I know God has helped me with a lot of problems
98. I know my kids love me and that is the best feeling ever!!
99. I love to get flowers
100. I like to read my horoscope just for the fun of it!!
Well there you have it.... 100 facts about Amanda Tuck

Depression strikes again

This is one of those days or we can say one of those weeks... I know I struggle with depression and really bad social anxiety. I really wish I did not, but I do. I guess the season don't help and the fact that I really try so hard to fit in but I just don't feel like I do. I so remember the days when I had so many friends it was almost like they fought over me but now I have No girlfriends, my husband works all the time and I truly have the most dysfunctional family ever. I just get so down that I don't won't to move. Food and bed seem to be my only comfort. I feel so bad because I have to most wonderful kids and yet I am to busy being depressed. I so know it is a fact, that you can not control depression and the social anxiety that I have. I cannot wait to go to the doctor and hope to get on medication. That also could be a problem for me, we don't have health insurance and I have had back surgery, so I really hurt. It is not easy, then I feel guilty for always being down when I know of so many people that are having hard times but I really cannot control it. New Years resolution # 1... find a way to deal with my personal problems, #2 I need friends

Going to school.....

 That is right, I am going back to school!! I am going to Palmetto Beauty College and I love it. I took cosmetology way back in high school but I did not finish so I decided to go back. I got to admit, it is a real challenge with me trying to find a babysitter for Ada but so far I am doing it. I do not get to go everyday like I wish I could go because Michael may not be at home or who knows but usually I get to get my hours that I need for a week.
 You have to have 1500 hours to finish and I have like 130 hours!!!!! Oh Yeah!! but you got to start somewhere. I just can't wait to finish and to make money doing something I love doing. My kids and husband are really excited for me too and it should take me about a year if I can get the hours I need to get.... I will for sure be blogging more about this subject!!

My wonderful church

Yesterday had to be one of my most depressing days and to be honest I am not really sure why. I know Michael does not have a job at this time and we are broke but when I think about it, I have not wanted for anything!! We are eating good and my kids are not going to start school wanting anything.
 I think sometimes staying inside a house all day can just get to ya. My point in my story is that I am so lucky to be part of the wonderful church that I am a part of. They really reached out for me just because they seen I was having a bad day. I tell ya I think if I could go to church everyday, I  would. I just go to church and forget about everything else and just really feel good inside. I am so thankful that I made to choice to let Jesus be my savior!! It don't matter that the devil is trying really hard to pull my family down because God is making it that I always come out on top. I pray that anyone that is curious about the bible like I was and wondering if they can live for God, that they act on it because it is so amazing the works of GOD.

Days seem smoother

 I think things are starting to look a little brighter... I don't think Michael being laid off was ever as bad as maybe it sounded. Today he went to the child support office to see about getting the payments lower and they said for sure that would happen. This is something Michael has been meaning to do since we had Ada but he just never got around to it. He has been paying way to much for a long time. This is a good thing... He is finally getting around to getting it lowered and this is something that  would have never got done if  he was working.
 Other good things in the coming is tomorrow he goes to his unemployment appointment and the person that is seeing him tomorrow is someone he knows from high school. He told Michael that he would do everything he could to get him a job. That is great news!!!
 It isn't that we have really got great news but it is kinda like things are not seeming to be as bad. One thing for sure is I am so glad we are good with God at this time. People are losing there jobs everyday and I can't not imagine going through this without having God in my life. We have been upset and scared but at least we have been able to find comfort in his word and had assurance that everything was going to be ok. As each day goes on I am getting more of a since of ease that things are going to be great.
 Thanks to my Lord for everything and just holding our hands through this time in our life's.

A small mishap...

I have not posted a blog in a few days and that is because my family has been dealing with a lot of stress. Wednesday, June 23rd Michael was permanently laid off of his job that he has had for 11 years. 
I really am staying positive for the most part but I must admit it gets really hard. When you know you got kids to take care of. I do trust that everything will be ok because I know that this is not the worst thing that has ever happened and also along with Michael, 49 other people got laid off. I am trusting in God because I know he will take care of us. When I decided to change my life for God, it was for good and and I will not let the Devil get me this soon because I worked too hard to get to where I am at in my life.
 I told Michael the day we decided to get saved that we should expect something bad  to happen.  I was right on that one. We are still really shocked and I guess I do keep worrying about Michael running out of his medicine. He is a diabetic and has seizures without medicine. The 30th of this month he will not have health insurance. He has already began looking for jobs so I am just praying that something comes soon enough so that he will not run out of medicine. I know it will work out.
 We really should feel lucky that this has not already happened to us. When you look at the BIG picture, the government does not even have enough money to pay people because of so much unemployment. We are lucky that Michael does have a good trade and that he kept that job as long as he did. Now we just got to pray that a job will come along that needs his trade.
 It is really a shame that our economy is in such a sad shape. It is so sad that it has to be so hard to work and take care of your family. I know for sure we will not take for granted any other job again. I know we did make enough to pay our bills and maybe we struggled around holidays but I also remember just never being grateful for us having a income we did have. It usually always takes something like this to make you become a stronger and more grateful person.
To sum it all up, we don't know what the future holds for us at this point but I think it is ironic of these scriptures I have ran across while we were put in this situation...
 Philippians 4:13- I can do all things through Christ witch strengthens me
 Psalm 91:15-  He shall call upon me, and I will answer him:
I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him.
 Matthew 6:8- The Father knows what things we are in need of before we ask him
  Psalm 37:5- Commit to the way of the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass
 1 John 5 :14- In the confidence we have in him, that, if we ask anything according to his will, he will hear us
 Just seeing those scriptures assures me that everything will be just fine if I just trust in God.

One Fetish

In life I don't have many fetishes but one that I do have is I like to have cool and nice sunglasses but geez I just cannot keep up with them or Ada breaks them. The funny part of this story is maybe 2 months ago Kerry bought me a pair of sunglasses from Hotspot and they only cost $1.00 and this past weekend Michael bought me a pair of Ninewest sunglasses and tonight Ada broke them:(. Like I always tell Katie it is her responsibility to keep up with her glasses so it is my fault. I should have had them put up better but I really really did like my sunglasses. At least I still have my ones from Hotspot!! Gotta love the cheap ones because they are the ones that seem to last.